“Whenever I try to do copywriting, it comes out boooorrrring! Same with ads. I can write articles and have no problems keeping the reader’s interest, why can I not do this with copywriting? I don’t want to use hype, but I would like to get their attention.”

Let’s do a quick review of my answer to Peg, and then we’ll take a look at the ad Peg was courageous enough to submit ...

1) The ads most likely to be noticed are the ones that can do something for the reader; solve a problem, make a task easier, help them feel better, etc. Make sure your headline does its job!

2) Remember, your ad only one of many out there. Don’t be shy about trying to convince people that your product is THE one he/she cannot do without..

3) Be sure that the ad is “YOU” directed; not full of I’s, me’s and my’s” but “you” and “your” instead. Remember your readers first concern: “What’s in it for me?”

4) The key ingredient to a good ad that is so frequently overlooked: Tell your readers what you want them to do – Click On The link, Send An Email, Order Now!!!!

5) Details folks, details. Don’t forget what separates amateur from pro – you don’t have to be perfect, but there is no reason to be sloppy either. Proofread and spell check each and every time. Catch those typos and broken links before your ad gets lost in cyberspace.

And now the actual ad that Peg describes as “boring” ....

“Increase Your Marketing Skills! Let Us Help! Since Internet marketing is changing, we cannot keep up to date by ourselves. I wonder if we can join forces to our advantage. We just launched a network of all levels of marketers. I’d be honored to have you on board.” http://www.residualnetwork.com/index1.html?496

Ladies and Gentlemen, can this ad be saved???? I say absolutely “YES!” And here are the exact steps I’d suggest to help the process along...

Since I was not the originator of the ad, the first thing I did was click on over to the link so I could read all about it. Peg’s ad is introducing a program called “Residual Network.” From what I gather, the program is geared toward struggling marketers. It supposedly offers personal mentoring and step-by-step instructions to help people learn how to generate a recurring monthly income.

On the positive side, Peg’s Ad is warm and welcoming and seems to reflect the helping spirit of the program. There are no misspellings or typographical errors. But, as Peg herself, stated, the ad is not generating any excitement. It needs to hit harder and address the “what’s in it for me?” question.

***A point to remember when writing an ad: If you don’t get excited about what you’re selling, nobody else will either!

Let’s start with the headline “Increase Your Marketing Skills!” Now let’s see if we can turn it around and make it command attention! Here are a few thoughts: “Are You Tired Of Coming Up Empty Handed While Others Are Making All The Money?” ... “Are You Tired Of Losing Sleep Over Money?” ... The Money IS Out There – Here’s How You Get It!”

Keep working on that headline until you convince yourself it couldn’t get any better. And, yes, there are endless ways for you to go with it. Now let’s look at the body of the ad: Peg says: “Let Us Help! Since Internet marketing is changing, we cannot keep up to date by ourselves. I wonder if we can join forces to our advantage. We just launched a network of all levels of marketers.”

Let’s see ... sounds like Peg is saying “help is available, the Internet is constantly changing, and, there’s something to be gained whatever your level of skill.” How can Peg now entice the reader to click on that all important link? How about ...

“Are you tired of coming up empty handed while others make all the money? What if you had your own mentor to teach you how to generate a monthly residual income? Introducing the program that does all that and more – no matter what your level of skill!” Better? I think so.

Now let’s look at the ending. “I’d be honored to have you onboard.” Remember – call to action! Tell your reader precisely what to do: “Join us and start making money today. Click on: http://www.residualnetwork.com/index1.html?496”

Now let’s pull it all together:

“Are You Tired of Coming Up Empty Handed While Others Make All The Money? What if you had your own mentor to teach you how to generate a monthly residual income? Introducing the program that does all that and more – no matter what your level of skill!” Join us and start making money today. Click on: http://www.residualnetwork.com/index1.html?496”

You tell me, folks – do you think that will do a better job for Peg? This is where I put the ball (or rather ad) right back in your court. Either it does the job you want it to do or you keep working on it till you’re satisfied. Nobody knows your own product or service better than you – at least that’s how it should be. You do not have to be a great writer. Give it passion, give it heart, follow the basic guidelines I gave you and you can’t possibly miss.

And that, my friends, is today’s last word. Be sure to stop by and visit Peg’s website. And hey – I need more questions to keep this column going. Why not send yours in today! Have a great week!!!

Phyllis Schwartz is a longtime copywriter with a career background in Direct Mail and Promotional Advertising. Whether you need a sales letter for your home page, keyword optimized web content, articles, emails or direct mail copy, Phyllis is the one to call. For a full menu of copywriting services go to BetterCopywriting.com.

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